Hello my dear readers, welcome to another blog…. today my blog title expresses more than what I have to say.

This blog is a love letter, ripping off a band aid, or applying ointment to my wounds….
how many metaphors do I talk about? I believe I will always have another one to say.

My birthday was 2 weeks ago, I have finally entered my late 20s era. And while I was sitting with myself, receiving wishes and feeling all the feelings, I started thinking about how my last decade looked. What it held. What it taught me.

No matter what generation you are reading this from, we all have that one thought growing up, I will start dating or enter into a relationship when I am 18. None less to say, I was the same….
And then some people end up marrying that first person. In my case, I got an ex. And then another, and then another got adding in the list.

Today it has been a long time since I started dating but things are still the same. I always find someone interesting at first, we click, slowly the pages unfold and I understand, oh God, this is another lesson and not the forever.
And sitting here now, on the other side of another birthday, I think of the What-ifs. What if I had ended up with that ex? Or that one? And honestly, it feels like a nightmare in my head.

Not because they were bad. Trust me, I have not been with someone bad, and I know the terms of bad can mean different things. But none of them treated me badly. The normal human decency was always there. It just did not work out.

Sometimes in my head I relive those moments. I think about them. And my dear readers, I have to say if you have dated anyone and are now in your single era, I am not saying in casual way but those happy moments with your exes were good however there will be a list of reasons why you chose to end it. Please visit that list when the nostalgia hits.

I feel extremely lucky because of all those boys who came into my life, showed me why they should not be in my life, and were like passengers who waited for the next stop and got off. Or I made them exit a little earlier than they planned. Thanks to those who stayed through the hard times, guided me to listen to my instincts, helped me trust myself…. and then left again. You still taught me something.

And through all of it, quietly and loudly at the same time, there were my friends. The ones who carried the light for me when I could not find it. Who listened to me rant about the same guy again and again without once making me feel like too much. All of these situations showed me who my real friends are, why they love me, and why I should love and choose myself.
I will always be grateful for that.

While this blog is my vulnerable side, I cannot tell you how many days and nights I gave to writing this and finding the courage to actually post it. But here it is.

PS to the guys I dated I am glad it did not worked out and happier that we din’t get married.

I love reading books and yes, I have my own fictional favourite man. And one of my friends once advised me, please lower your standards, those men do not exist in the real world. I hear you. I really do.
My fictional men are probably not walking around exactly as written. But there are 7 billion people in this world. Somewhere out there, maybe someone ticks 90% of the list. And maybe, just maybe, that is my forever.

Till then, a promise to myself. Not to shrink for someone else’s standards. Not to regret the ones I dated, well, maybe one or two.
And a decade from today, when I come back to read this, I hope I have chosen myself still.

Also, PS. Its love letter to me and not to my exes.

Heyyy, how are you all doing?

We are in that time of the year where everywhere you step, you see love in the air. And trust me, there is nothing wrong with that. But something always makes me wonder — is Valentine’s Day and this entire week a business gimmick, or is it really about love?

As most of you might know, I am single. But there was a time I was in a relationship too. I have seen partners who say this is all a waste of money. A rose today costs twice its normal price. And I have also seen partners who romanticise it, who want to celebrate, who want to make something grand out of it.

My logical side tells me that one day or one week cannot make something special. It has to be consistent. It has to be all the time. But another part of me feels these small moments are reminders. They make you pause and realise how important someone is in your life.

Now the world works a little differently.

When I started dating a few years ago, gestures and affection meant something. Making an effort to make your partner feel special was normal. Now there is this entire culture of being chalant and nonchalant. Acting unbothered. Acting like effort is too much.

I am practical, yes. But I still believe making an effort matters. Showing someone you matter. Saying you are chosen. Doing something simply because you know your partner will like it.

I know such love still exists in today’s time. The kind where you are loved and pampered without hesitation. But my question remains the same: is doing something only for this week and not for the entire year a deal breaker? Or doing it all year and ignoring this one week a deal breaker?

Also, what really stops people from doing it?

We say life is busy. Ask me about it. But here is a small exercise for you. Start noting the things you do not like, and you will find a hundred reasons not to do them. Now choose something you genuinely like. You will not need reasons. You will simply do it.

So whether Valentine’s Day is important to you or not, if your partner or loved one can feel good because of it, why not? What is truly stopping you?

Even if it is a business gimmick, are we not already part of so many systems created by business? So why is this the one we question so deeply?

At the end of the day, it depends on you. Whether you choose bare minimum or princess treatment. Whether you choose to be chalant or nonchalant. And trust me, this is not gender specific.

Big wins deserve celebration, yes. But the joy of celebrating something small, just because you can, is a different kind of happiness.

And before anyone misunderstands — after saying all this, do not assume I am not celebrating. Having a partner or not should never restrict you from finding joy.

I celebrate myself. I have been. I will continue to. And that is the standard I hold for myself too.